We Went Shopping

Chris and I went all over creation today to do some furniture shopping. We went to LaZboy, Furniture Fair, Value City Furniture (VC Boutique), Arhaus, Haverty's, and Sofa Express. There were several possibilities, but in the end, it came down to quality/price. We ruled out Value City because we were concerned about the quality of the leather. Oh yeah, we were shopping for leather. I wanted pants, but Chris wanted furniture. I'm the bitch in the relationship. Anyway, we ended up buying a couch, chair and ottoman from Sofa Express. The picture here shows the couch that we bought (although it looks slightly different in my opinion from the real thing). I'm just so happy to have some new furniture versus hand-me-downs. Come on over and check it out, my bitches!

Another Quick Survey

It's totally anonymous and it's 6 questions. This time, it's not about masturbation, it's about work. So, take a breath. And go here. Take the poll. Don't be a PUSSY.

Lots to do tomorrow

1. Drink. Just kidding.
1. Go shopping for new furniture
2. Clean the house
3. Go shopping for N.Y.E.
4. Prepare food for N.Y.E.
5. Masturbate
6. Drink. Not kidding.
6 1/2. Watch movie or play Texas Hold 'em or hmmm....blog
7. Pass Out

Halfway Through the Week

Today is Wednesday for me. Although, tomorrow will be Friday...as far as work goes. It's nice to have Monday and Friday off as holidays. It also helps that I'm working from home. Tee hee. So, I'm farting around here at home and I've downloaded a few songs. One of which is "My Humps" by the Black Eyed Peas. It's sickeningly great. I highly suggest you, um, buy it. Other than that, I'm surfing the net looking at living room furniture. Chris and I paid off our TV this week - YEA! - so now we're on the hunt for a new leather couch and chair. That is, unless of course, one of you want to surprise us and buy them for us. OK, I'm not that dumb. I know you bitches are too cheap.

I'm Back

So, it was a long, yet fun, Christmas weekend. It took my bowels a while to get back to normal (due to lots of appetizers and alcoholic beverages). Tonight, Chris and I rented a couple of movies and I cooked dinner. (He wasn't feeling like a million bucks). We ended up renting Bewitched, and I'll tell you what... even though it got crappy reviews, Chris and I laughed our asses off. I'm not a big Will Farrel fan, nor a Nicole Kidman fan for that matter, but it was damn funny. That just goes to show what "professional critics" know. Get down with the people, man! Or else, get down, get down.....get down, get down...

Chrismas 2005

We had a fantastic Christmas in both Cleveland and Cincinnati this year. Here are some pictures of our weekend for you all to relish. There's not much else to say, other than that a good time was had by all. FYI, Chris got me an Ipod Nano! We got a Roomba and Chris got the complete collection of The New Yorker on DVD. This Christmas was not a fizzle, it was an AL SHIZZLE!

We hope to drink with you all...I mean see you all soon. Merry, Merry everyone.

Last Post for a While

Tomorrow, we'll be leaving for Cleveland and staying there until Christmas morning. We'll then drive back to the 'nati and go straight to my sister's place to celebrate Christmas with my family. So, might I suggest going to past postings and entertain your craving for some of my brilliant writings. Word, boyyeeeeeee.

One last question: Milk, milk, lemonade, 'round the corner fudge is made?

Christmas Shopping is DONE

Finally, I am done Christmas shopping. I've only had one thing to get for about 3 days now, which was an ornament for Chris. We decided a couple of years ago to just get each other one nice gift and an ornament. Awww, how fucking cheesy. Regardless, we like it and it adds personality to our Christmas tree. Well, today at lunch, I got him one and I'm officially finished shopping for Christmas. Thank God, because I can't stand going near malls during the holidays. Per one of my earlier posts, I highly recommend shopping online. It's a frustration-saver and it leaves more time for jerking off at home.

A Fucking Riot

We just watched Kathy Griffin: Allegedly. She makes me fall out with laughter. I love how she shreads everyone - I mean everyone. It was on Bravo, so it was edited for the bad language, but they left in the word "clit" in when she was talking about how the Iraqis cut their daughters' clits off. I couldn't believe they kept THAT word in! Anyway, check it out if you can - it's pure entertainment. And she loves her gays.

I Need a 12 Step Program or Intervention

I've realized I have a serious problem. I've become addicted to something and it's consuming too much of my time. Today, I played Texas Hold 'Em for 3 hours. That's sick. It's that handheld game I got off of WOOT last week. I finish one game and think to myself, "Oh, one more game won't take too long." Three plus hours later, I won twice in a row. Are there any other people out there facing this same addiction? Actually, I DO know of one other person who is addicted. I won't reveal that it is Laura Wooley, because I wouldn't want to embarrass her or anything. I welcome anyone to start a support group for this problem. At our meetings, maybe we can talk about it over a game of cards or something.

I Feel Like I Hit the Jackpot

I got 4 packages in the mail today! That's a record for me - granted, two of them were Christmas presents that I ordered, but it was fun opening all the packages. The two that were not gifts were: 1.) My Holiday gift from P&G (which was kick-ass; tons of P&G products) and 2.) the Texas Hold 'em handheld game that I ordered off of Woot. I'm pissed though because it takes three AAA batteries and we don't have any. We have a fuck-load of AA batteries, but, alas, none of the kind I need. All in all, my advice for the day is: If you like getting packages in the mail, order online. Not only does it save you from going to hell (the mall), but it brings those little bundles of joy that receiving a package in the mail brings. With that said, I'm granting you permission to buy me something and having it shipped straight to Stanford Drive.

Another Sort of Poll

I'm not going to do the formal poll like I did a few posts back, so just respond on the comments section. Here's the question: What are your immediate neighbors' names....on the left of you and on the right of you. Ours are - On the right: Katie and Pez On the left - Marlene and her son Steve. Ante up.

Who Can Beat This?

I was just thinking about my new job and that led to thinking about past jobs. I've been out of college for 10 years now and, in that time, I've had a total of 6 jobs (with 6 different companies). And here they are in chronological order:

1. Cincinnati Bell Telephone - Marketing
2. Marketsource Corporation - Marketing
3. Hasbro Toy Group - Marketing
4. Pet Life Foods, Inc. - Marketing
5. Sare Lee Foods - Marketing
6. Procter & Gamble - Marketing

I guess it's true what people in the business world say about marketing people jumping from job to job all the time. On the other hand, if you ask my friends, they'd say I run companies either out of business or out of Cincinnati. Well, pussies, you're all wrong. It's the Gen-X slacker in me that has gotten me where I've been. I give this Procter gig a year.

I take that back, they're paying me too much to leave that soon. (Unless they can my ass).

Just Wanted to Say

I love my baby. He's my one and only.

Stay Away Tonight

I think because my body is fighting this cold, it's having ill-effects on my innurds. In two words: I STANK! My gas is running ME out of the room. I'm talking rotten eggs, sulphur and limburger cheese wrapped into one. Lucky Chris. HA-HA!

WOOT

There is this website called WOOT that I came upon and it's pretty fucking cool. Everyday, they only put one item up for sale and there is a limited quantity. Ergo, first come, first serve. The best part about it is that they sell some pretty nice stuff at deeply-throated discounts. Check it out, I just bought something on there yesterday. And no, it wasn't the gi-normous TV that's on there today.

I'm Getting Sick

This afternoon at work, I started feeling the beginnings of illness coming on. You know that feeling when you start feeling very physically tired and get that "out of it" feeling? Well, it began today. I'm feeling a little worse since I've gotten home. I did eat some chicken noodle soup and have been drinking o.j., but I have a feeling tomorrow's going to be worse. I'm going to take a shot of Nyquil and call it a night. I can deal, as long as I don't get a sore throat. That's what really sucks.

Once Again

My hand still smells like lube.

I'm Ahead of the Game

Today I got very close to being done with my Christmas shopping. Yea for me! Now, there are only two people left I have to buy for, plus an ornament to give to Chris. Usually, I am shopping the weekend or days before Christmas and I'm always stressed out because I have no idea what to get people. I guess people CAN change. Internet shopping was a brilliant invention too - I bought 3 of the gifts online. Hopefully I will get the last two things this week and be done with it. Then I can concentrate on buying stuff for myself.

Good Times, Good Friends

Tonight was so much fun, seeing all of my college comrades. People were in from all over (relatively); Chicago, Toledo, Cleveland, perhaps more. The kick-ass part of it all is that it's been 10 years since we graduated college and we're all still getting together. That's some tight friendships. The disturbing part of it all is that we all still act the same around each other...in drinking situations...like 12 year olds. Say "fart" and we all laugh; girls and boys. That must be why we all stick so close together. Unless it's an SBD.

My Wardrobe Sucks

I have nothing to wear. Everything is old and/or out of date. I need shopping help, please. I've been sitting here, trying to figure out what I'm going to wear tonight to Suzanne's Christmas party and I have nothing. I would go naked, but it's too damn cold out. Oh, I know, I'll go naked, wearing a smile.

Birthdays are Fun

I'm glad I got to celebrate Momma's birthday along with Jason, Chris and Douggie. It's a cryin' shame that we all got a bit too intoxicated to make a real night of it. Although, I think the waiter had a little thing for Momma, even though he was a "straight" guy. Happy Birthday, Sister, even though this is coming several days early!

Classy, huh?

I was looking at old pictures and came across this one. It's from my friend Suzanne's christmas party a year or two ago. Notice the beer spilling out of my mouth. The mark of a true gentleman.

Ripped Off

We were supposed to get snow starting at 4 today through the morning tomorrow. Well, ONCE AGAIN, the weathermen were wrong. We got about 4 inches or so and then it started turning to rain. FUCKERS! It's now 35 degrees out and has stopped doing anything. The radar shows a bit more coming, but I'm sure that by the time it gets here, it will be more rain. And I was planning on a snow day tomorrow. I HATE the Ohio Valley - we always get ripped off! Why can't we just get dumped on? (And I'm not meaning a hot carl).

Where Has JW Been?

I haven't gotten many smart-ass comments lately. Am I losing my touch?

The Networks Lie

Last week, we watched Lost and they showed the "scenes" for next week. Well, after having several botched attempts to correctly record shows on TIVO in the past, Chris and I figured out that you have to put something on a season pass to undoubtedly record a show every week. When we got home tonight, fucking Lost wasn't recorded. Turns out, stupid jerkoffs didn't show a new episode of Lost tonight. It was a re-run. After reviewing our recording preferences on TIVO, we figured out that the default setting (on ours, at least) was to record only new shows. This cleared up some of the confusion as far as why some shows would record and others wouldn't. I was about to bitch up a storm to DirecTv/TIVO about the miss and hit we've experienced. Regardless, buttfuck ABC should at least advertise that it will be two weeks (or however much time) until the next new episode airs. I even ended up calling Momma to verify whether it was a new episode tonight or not. Note to ABC: Get in touch with your viewers. It just might give you some credibility.

I'm, Like, Almost Celebrity

Chris and I met my college friend Noah out tonight downtown for some drinks since he is in town for work. Chris Adrien and My Brian happened to be at Union Station getting dinner (great minds think alike), so we hung out with them until Noah was done with his work stuff. So, we picked him up and ended up going to McFadden's, an Irish bar/restaurant. When we got there, we all heard a raucous in the back room of the place. Not ever having been there before, I was searching for the bathroom. I didn't see one up front, so I wandered into the back where all the commotion was coming from. At first, it looked like a birthday party - there were balloons hanging at the door entrance and there was a long table inhabited by tons of people. At the same time, there was a projection TV showing some sort of show they were all going nuts-o over. So, after finding the bathroom and taking a leak, I went back up front to Chris and Noah. Meanwhile, Chris, the observant one of the group, notices that The Amazing Race (family edition) is showing and commented that one of the families participating was from Cincinnati. He deduced that this might be a group of friends and family members or some sick cultish group of followers watching the episode there. Well, it turns out that Chris was right. After a while, we hear some dude annoucing over the p.a. that he wanted to thank his friends & family, and that they'd be in New York next week since they made it to the final three. And, "please, watch in support", but didn't give any other details. Damn those network-contract-nazi-whores making participants sign confidentiality agreements. Anyway, we had a very, very, very slight brush with psuedo-stardom tonight and I thought it was better to fill you in on that instead of my stool consistency. You never know what lurks around the corner...I just might meet Marsha Brady in person.

Noah, Part The Waters

Noah, are you in town this week? This is one of my best friends from college. He is supposed to be in town for work, coming in from the booming metropolis of Cleveland. Noah, Chris and I really would like to get together with you if you ended up making it down. Give us a cwall, we can do cuoffee. Or beer. Except on Wednesday night. I am required by work to drink that night at Jillians. Stephanie is hoping to see you. Steph! Steph! Steph!

Today Was Interesting

I'm in "ABM College" for work this week. It stands for Assistant Brand Manager and it's a training that P&G makes all new-hires in marketing go to. Today was our first day of this week-long program. Part of the day included an assignment of going to a consumer's house and having a one-on-one focus group with them. I won't get into the details, or else I'd have to kill you, (or be fired), but the experience was quite crazy. This particular woman lived in Lockland - a not-so-nice area of town. Frankly, it looked like the projects. It turned out that this was a very nice 53 year old woman who we had to interview. First of all, I am not one to be very comfortable going into a strange person's house. Secondly, the fact that it was in the semi-hood didn't help either. Regardless, I went there with an open mind. Well, I went there with another ABM college attendee and we did our job. The fucked up part about the whole experience was that her 31 year old live-in son hung out in the next room the whole time and was basically evesdropping the whole time. I'm talking OBVIOUSLY evesdropping. The kicker was when two of his wt buddies showed up at the door with some greasy take out lunch. Her words were, "you two get in the kitchen there and hush." I can't say that it was ideal in that she proabably didn't truly answer our questions with the wt in the next room. Anyway, it was definitely an awkward experience to say the least. Looking back on it though, it was kind of fun/funny. At least I can say I've been to Lockland once and I know for a fact I'll NEVER feel the need to visit there again. Sorry Kevin.

Adonis Rocks!

We went to the new Adonis nightclub last night, and it is pretty fucking cool. First of all, it's HUGE. There are several different areas in the place with different themes. For example, there is a lounge-type area when you first walk in, right in front of a big fireplace. As you walk further down, there is a big open area in front of a bar, along with some chairs and such. Keep walking further, and there is a room on the left with a couple of pool tables (I coined it the dyke room). Past that is the dance floor. Wow. It is certainly a dance floor. There are to platforms on either side of the floor where all the twinks and meth-addicts can dance, and an L-shaped bar on the one side of the room. The sound system. The sound system kicks ass! I love when you can actually feel the bass when a song is thumping. I stood back there for quite a while (while trying to get rid of the hiccups). Walk through the dance floor through another door and you're in a piano bar first, then into a huge performance room. Aka, the drag queen room. I was delighted to see Tony Cody (aka Penny Tration) preforming there last night. Of course, he came up during one of his performances and had fun with us. The only part that kind of sucked is that there's no smoking inside. They did have a porch area in back where you could smoke, surrounded in a wind-breaker plastic covering. That helped, along with the heat lamp thing they had going. Summer time should be interesting, since there is a pool in back next to that patio. It was funny because they already had a sign posted by the doors going inside that said shirts required. Ha, yeah right. All in all, the place is kick-ass. The only down side is that it's a bit of a drive compared to the downtown clubs. Final verdict: A winner. I'll be there many more times in the future. Kudos to the new owners.

TLC is Great

I really like some of the shows that are on TLC. I'm watching Flip This House right now and it's a really cool show. Recently, I've gotten into the home improvement/renovation/restoration shows and I'm always amazed at the work some people accomplish. The best are the ones where the place is a total dump and they turn it into some kick-ass living space. It also gives me some ideas about what we could do with our kitchen, once we get around to redoing it. I think I want to bust a wall out, just because I can.

Give Me a Break

See two posts ago? It's happened again, except this time it's been all night. How fun.

Results of the Survey

Thanks to the 10 people that participated. Here are the results in case you're curious to see the breakdown. I was kind of surprised by some of the responses. Things that make you go h'mm....

I Don't Get It

Why is it that your husband/wife/significant other retreats at home when you just want to hang out and talk about your day? Tonight, among others, my signifcant other spent half the night in front of the computer instead of spending it with me. I will admit, I can't compete with the internet, as I'm not as interesting. Don't get me wrong...once I flipped on the TIVO, he ripped himself away. Sorry to bitch, but it seems like it's been a more frequent occurence lately. We have this weird relationship where we don't talk. So........that's all. Talk to y'all tomorrow.

Haircut Time

I just gave myself a haircut - it was way overdue. Here are some before and after pictures - and to prove that there REALLY IS a difference, I've included proof. Number 1: Before. Number 2: After. Number 3: Proof. And, NO, I'm not going bald, it's just the way the pictures came out. I'll have hair until the day I die, jealousnesses.