My New Obsession

Earlier today, Chris tried start the VW (a.k.a. Satan) Cabrio. It just wouldn't. The poor car has seen its better days. Meanwhile, I'm at work, checking out classified ads and I stumble upon the picture above. I want it. I've been keeping my eye out for classic convertibles and this is the car that I want. For those of you who don't know this particular model, it's an early 70's Triumph TR6. I personally think (although Chris would disagree) that this car is more appealing vs. the MGB. Then again, I wear the pants in this household. (Again, Chris would disagree). Any way you slice and dice it, we'll have a fun, older convertible this summer. Say goodbye to the Satan-mobile, or as VW would like to have it called, the Cabrio. Enter stage left.....the Triumph. At least at this present moment.

Side note: The actual car I'm trying to get is the first one (green). The blue one is just to show what the model looks like from behind. Wish me luck, hos.

Haha, Chris Has a Disease

I've never heard of it before, but my honey has Asperger (pronounced Ass-burger, in my opinion) Syndrome. Check it out. Pay particular attention to the parts where it talks about narrow, intense interests (especially obsessions with transportation, geography, computers and dinosaurs). OK, you can omit the dinosaurs, but insert 1960s English cars. So, so true. I didn't know that I lived with Rainman! Awww, honey, I still love you. If I happen to drop a box of matches in the morning and look to you for an immediate answer, just ignore me. It was most likely just a mistake on my part. I'm all about healing. I want you to be normal someday.

P.S. I know I'm going to pay for this one

Cars

So, Chris and I had a discussion earlier tonight about each others' car usage. We both drive our OWN cars. Period. At least that's been the track record. Unless on a roadtrip. Here's the greater question...how many of you all folk drive each others' cars? I'm all about sharing and not necessarily "claiming" a certain car. Chris defaults to his own car, as do I. But, part of the reason I did (or have) is because his car was new. Automatically, I assumed that he would want to drive it until the honeymoon was over. However, it will have been a year this coming week and he still religiously drives his car without even thinking of using mine. Chris, honey, I know that we've already discussed this, but I want to hear others' feedback. :-) Do you share cars in general or once in a while trade cars or is the first one free up for grabs? I love having the option to decide what car I want to take in the morning, but it's not currently the case. Long, long, story short, I want to know what all you party-people in cyberspace do when it comes to a dual-household along with dual cars. Nothing witty is coming to mind, so please just put in your comments. Or else I'll be forced to make my own conclusions. Please, don't force me to anything rash like that.

I'm Officially Gay

I admit, there were no signs before, but now it's obvious. How?!, you ask? Well, it's because I like a Kelly Clarkson song. I know, it's sad and none of you ever suspected (very much), but yes, I'm gay and I like a Kelly Clarkson song. Specifically, the version that is currently playing on BPM. It's the Chris Cox remix version of Walk Away. I hope I don't lose any of you over this devastating news, but it's who I am. A Kelly Clarkson song-liker. Don't hate me because I'm beautiful (or the fact that I am actually enjoying someone who got there start on American Idol).

Great New Show

I didn't hear about the show Campus Ladies until recently when our friends Jim & Rob told us about it. Fucking hilarious!! It kind of reminds me of the same type of humor as in Strangers With Candy, but on a collegiate level. Barri and Joan are the two main characters and are totally entertaining. Oh yea, you can catch this show on the Oxygen network. (Who'd a thunk?) It's definitely a keeper and I highly recommend checking it out. I know I'll be tuned in - especially when the next episode will cameo Paul Reubens. Who doesn't like a little PeeWee? Well, strike that, but you know what I mean. Here is a clip from the "My First Orgasm" episode. Enjoy.

Finally, Some New TV Shows

We got the Sunday paper for once, and I checked out the TV schedule for this week. Oh my God, new TV shows. What are the networks thinking? I'm so used to re-runs, I don't think I can handle a new show. Seriously, it has been totally ridiculous the way they have been so blase about running new episodes. It's like, oh, I don't feel like uploading any new episodes, so I'll just replay one that from a couple of weeks ago. Anyway, I'm used to sporadically getting new snippets of my favorite shows. Good thing is that there are some new snippets this week, starting with Desperate Housewives tonight. Don't miss it, bitches.

This is Pretty Funny

Thanks to Chris for sharing this. In his words, more or less, it's about time that someone made a real-life spoof. Check out the Simpsons.

I Hate Swiffering

I love the look of hardwood floors 100x more than carpet. However, having to keep them clean is a pain in the ass. We do have a Roomba, but when a house requires a thorough cleaning, the Roomba doesn't quite cut it. When the Swiffer first came out, I thought it was a Godsend. I don't think my opinion has changed much, but with a house the size of ours.....totally sucks. It took me about 2 hours just to clean the hardwood. The biggest pain is that we have dog hair. Dog hair floats/flies. So, it's like you have to Swiff the whole house twice. Good thing I had a beer in hand most of the time while doing so. Now the house is immaculate, but I'm half bombed. Moral of the story: House cleaning makes me drink.

Weather Prediction

SUCKS in Cincinnati. I love how they originally say we're going to get 5-12 inches. We got 2. I thought it would be awesome, but I wasn't hopeful. It happens here all the time. Oh, and we have 5 Doppler radars, state of the art, blah, blah, yadda. I certainly picked the wrong profession in life. I should have been a meteorologist - it's the only job you can have where being wrong has no consequences.

We Were Shopping FOOLS Today

I made a list of all the things that we were getting low on. It turned out to be quite a list. So, Chris and I went to Costco (my favorite store), and ended up spending over $200 on just household "stuff." Then we went to Bed Bath & Beyond because we had a 20% off coupon (gotta love that). We bought another new comforter for our new kick-ass bed because the first one we got was too heavy to have on year round. Now we have a lighter comforter for summer. It's so pretty...like me. Then we went to pick up dry cleaning and also the grocery store. After Chris cleaned out the refrigerator yesterday, the thing was practically barren. So, we stocked up on some vittles. Now, I'm tired. Our excursion today came with a price. We ended up blowing about $450. Anyone treating us to dinner tonight?

Disgusting Chore

I HATE having to clean the bathroom. So, I avoid doing it. But, my bathroom was getting pretty foul, so I decided to clean it today. Now I remember why I hate it so much. Again....it was just foul. But, now you could eat off of everything. I wouldn't recommend it, but you could. If Jack McFarland were at my house right now, I'd direct him to it, saying, "Look, something shiny!"

Tonight

Chris and I went to BW-3 and had dinner. Alone. There were two other couples that potentially were going to meet up. One of the couples called earlier asking to go out with us...only to get a call later to say they felt sick and wouldn't be going out. The other of the couples never text messaged me back. That particular person knew we were going to BW-3 and said that it sounded fun. Well, I shouldn't have expected any more. It's routine these days. We ended up coming home and watching the movie Sybil. Pretty fucked up! (The movie, that is). But then again, so was this evening.

Ink

Chris asked me a question earlier tonight and now it has me thinking. He asked if I was going to get another tattoo or not. My initial reaciton was no. But.......now I'm sort of wondering. The one I have, I can't see because it's on my back between my sholderblades. It would be nice to have one where I could actually see it. Hmm...... I DO have the number to Skincraft. I DO live right up the street from there. I don't know. I'll have to sleep on this one. What do you all think?

Strangers

I'm totally pumped because I recently found out the the Strangers With Candy movie is going to be released this summer. It was supposed to be released this past October, but stupid fucking Warner Brothers or whoever was decided not to. ANYWAY, it's slated to come to theaters this summer. Me cants wait. And if you don't agree, you all can just "Read between the lines, PPPUSSY!"

Whoa, that was close...

I thought I just sharted. Luckily, everything was dry.

Non-TV-Appearing Losers

Yes, that's us because of Chris and John. I totally passed every question. OK, now for reality-world. I for sure did the worst. We had to take a written test for the World Series of Pop Culture try-outs. The test was 50 questions and we had to answer them in 15 minutes. Oh, and they were fill-in-the-blank. Sounds easy, right? Uh, not so much. Of 25 teams of three people, only 5 teams made it to the next step. The kicker was that each had to take the test individually and all members of that team had meet some kind of hurdle. The VH1 people never said what that correct number was - they only read off the winning teams after the tests were graded. Oh well, bygones. Sorry John, but you should have known you were signing Corky up on your team. This must never get back to Josh. Long story short, Strangers Without Candy will not be seen on TV this year. However, watch out America, SW/OC will be back again next year (less one Cincymatt)!

Sawing Logs

I am so excited for tonight. NO, Chris isn't going to sex me up (or at least I don't think so). I'm excited for our new king-sized, double mattress pad bed to sleep in! It came today and, per the picture, the motherfucker is HUGE. Check it out...the bed itself is higher than the window sill. It's a behemoth oddity in our bedroom. Well, besides my cock. But anyway, the best part is still to come. When I got home from work/shopping/visiting the parental units, I laid down to test it out. Heaven. Pure bliss. I won't be going into work on time tomorrow because I need to savor the feeling of sleeping on a cloud. (Plus, my boss will be out in focus groups). I had to put Hannah to the test. I wasn't sure if she would be able to make it up that high. What a fool I was. She jumped up like it was blinking an eye. Oh well, I guess we have enough room now that she can sleep with us. No, homey don't play dat.

Name That Movie

"Sorry, folks, park's closed."

Another Road Trip

This weekend is the weekend Chris, John Wooley and I go to Chicago to go through the screenings for VH1's World Series of Pop Culture. Chris and I are driving up on Friday after work and have an all-day Saturday try-out. Well, hopefully we'll make it an all-day deal by advancing onto the finals. Wish us luck, bitch-hos. Sunday, Chris will be driving back to Cincinnati, but I'll be staying because I've decided to move away from hell-hole Cincinnati. Just kidding. I have a work meeting on Monday at one of our agencies. So, I'll be hanging out with my college friend Bish Sunday afternoon. Then, work on Monday and fly home Monday night. Oh yea, which one of you wants to watch Hannah for us?

Now This is Something to be PROUD of

Delta State University in Mississippi has a mascot called the Flying Okra. SWEET! I'd be so proud of calling myself a flying okra. For that matter, I'd be proud of calling myself a flying booger. Or better yet, a flying bloodfart. How do they get so creative down in the South?????

My New Favorite Word

Paregoric. My mom mentioned using this on my sisters and I as kids. I think it's funny that my mother was giving her children morphine.

What a Weekend!

This weekend was awesome. Friday, we didn't do much, but the rest of the time was great. Saturday, we got up and went to my neice's birthday party (which was O.K.), but immediately from there, we went to Belterra. The complex was pretty big and had a lot of amenities. Chris and I dumped our bags in the room and went directly to the casino. Within an hour and a half, I dropped $140 on fucking slots. Ugh. Then we went to dinner at Jeff Ruby's. DEEE-LISH. We both got 12 oz. filets, garlic mashed potatoes and a bottle of wine. So then, we went back up to the room so that I could change into some more comfortable clothes. Back to the casino. Chris sat at a Blackjack table the rest of the night and I wandered from slot machine to slot machine. I decided this pretty quickly: I HATE video slots. I don't trust them and they're just not the same as the real deal. I started losing more cash and getting pretty drunk. With my last $4.75 left in the machine before going to withdrawal more money, I hit. I couldn't tell you what the bonus was called, but I watched as it kept going, and going, and going. I started out with $300 and almost went totally bust, but I ended up winning $403. YIPPEEEE! With that, I called it a night and went up to the room and passed out.

Today, on the way home from Belterra, we stopped in The Original Mattress Factory in Florence and compared different beds. We ended up deciding to buy the most expensive king size in the place. I'm soooo happy. I have an adult bed now. That should be arriving on Thursday - it's going to seem like Thursday will never get here. THEN, when I got home, I got an email saying that my tax refund was deposited into my account. Glory be, there is a God. So, the bed is paid off, I got my tax refund, AND I paid off the last of my credit card balance. Life is good. For the time being.

Bombed

That's what I am right now. And I have to get up early tomorrow....no later than 10. Tomorrow, we're going to my sister's house to celebrate my niece's birthday. BTW, I scored at Target and got some very girly-girl gifts. Some of my friends were jealous. After the par-tay, we'll be heading to the state of Indiana to do a tad bit of gambling. Funny thing about tonight...it happened to come up about the cost of the room we'll be staying at. Chris was obviously surprised about how much it cost. My interpretation of his reaction was that he initially thought it was a somewhat cheap hotel room. Oh no. It's definitely costing me, but I'm sure I'll win it back. Plus much more. I'm glad that I can treat him to something that will be really fun and not have to worry about sticking to a $30 budget. He has been so generous to me in the past (ie. buying me a mountain bike), so I am very happy to be able to return that generosity.

I'm Fetus in Fetu

I think I'm pregnant. I have a huge gut, I feel fat, and every once in a while, I think I feel something kicking in there. Then again, maybe I'm not fetus in fetu, because I wouldn't feel any movement. If you're wondering what I'm talking about, google it. I need to pick up the Mary-Kate Olsen habit. It worked wonders for her. Or, I could do what one of our not-to-be-named friends did and have lipo. Or according to him, I mean her, call it a vasectomy.