Last Post for a While

I know that half the world lives on every word I write on here, so I feel it's my duty to provide you with some activities during my vacation hiatus. Here are 10 suggestions to help pass the time:

1. Masturbate (it will pass 5 minutes each day)
2. Rent every Star Wars movie ever made and make it a marathon
3. Start an ant farm
4. Memorize all 50 states and their respective capitals (if you don't already know them)
5. Join your local 4H club
6. Toilet paper your neighbors' house that live 4 doors down (in either direction)
7. Try your hand at writing a computer virus
8. Make up your own hyperbole
9. Look in the telephone directory and call every "Johnson" that is listed. Talk to them. Get to know them.
10. Create a life-size diorama and pretend YOU are on vacation

Have fun next week, bitches. I'll be drunk while you're at work!